Temptation and Strength

The readings for church today really spelled it out: in Genesis 2 & 3, the serpent tempts Eve; she succumbs and Adam follows. In Matthew 4, Satan temps Jesus, yet he remains steadfast.

Listening to the Gospel this morning I was struck by the strength of Jesus in this situation. Matthew says that after Jesus fasted for forty days and forty nights, “he was hungry.” That’s perhaps the greatest understatement in the New Testament. And yet when Satan suggested he turn stones into bread, Jesus declined.

I thought about how I feel after missing just two meals. I think if someone said I could turn stones into bread, I wouldn’t hesitate. There’s this sort of panicky feeling I get, even when my rational mind says don’t worry, you’ll be eating before long. It is not out of fear of not having food available; the refrigerator and the cupboards are stocked. It isn’t because someone is forcing me to abstain: fasting is a discipline I choose freely.

The anxiety about food must just be hard-wired into our bodies. I can’t imagine what it must be like for people, especially children, who rarely have enough to eat and often do not know if there will be food for tomorrow. I know that even if they "get used" to it, they never cease to suffer. Many Americans have the opposite problem: we are so overfed that obesity threatens to become the #1 cause of death in this country. How can this be?

For myself, I have determined that I must learn to embrace the hunger (now I am getting a bit into the reason for the name of my blog). I must make being hungry the sign of my weakness, the reminder of my need for the strength and grace of God for my life. On those days that I choose to fast, my hunger also becomes a sign of my solidarity and sympathy with the people in the world who have no choice, who suffer from hunger all the time. It moves me to act, to share, to remember to add things for the food shelf into my shopping cart. It reminds me not to consume more than my fair share of the world’s resources.

The temptation to scurry back into my comfortableness is powerful. Yet I have also experienced the heightened spiritual awareness that comes with this sense of vulnerability. God’s strength becomes most evident when mine disappears.